Don’t Let Your Pain Become A Wall

You’re hiding again, curled up by the window, tears streaking down your face. With a frustrated sigh, you wipe at your cheeks, trying to stop crying. You’re breaking down again, as if this hasn’t already happened a half dozen times this week. Why are things like this? Why can’t you just hold it together?

 Beside you, your phone buzzes. Glancing down, you see that your friend has texted, wanting to know if you’re alright. Hesitantly, you pick up the phone, staring down at her words. 

 Some part of you considers responding… but instead, you just shut off the phone. She won’t understand what you’re feeling, and she can’t help you. You can get through this on your own. With another sigh, you go back to staring out the window. 

 Pain can build walls

 Has this ever been your experience, Roses? Have you ever found yourself blocking out the people around you because you feel that they won’t be able to help, or they don’t understand, or you think that you could get through this easier on your own?

 We often let our pain isolate us from our friends and family. More than that, we let struggles become a barrier between us and God. Far too often, our first move when we encounter difficulties is to retreat and block ourselves off from everyone around us. 

 This is a dangerous habit

 Isolating ourselves, however, is an incredibly harmful way to deal with struggles. It only leads to us feeling alone and unable to accept help. Building emotional walls around ourselves makes it far harder to turn to God, our ultimate strength in the midst of the storm, and cuts us off from the people He puts in our lives to help us. 

 When we let our struggles isolate us from God, we’re left anchorless and adrift in the confusing sea of emotions. If we aren’t relying on God in our pain and struggles, it becomes so much harder to cope and find some source of peace. 

We aren’t meant to go through things alone.

 Even though I’m not the most social person, I know the comfort of having a friend to walk through things with me. God created us for companionship, and He tells us to share in one another’s sorrows, to comfort each other, and to build each other up. 

 Galatians 6:2 “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” 

 Whatever you’re carrying, you don’t have to bear it on your own, Roses. 

 God gives us people to help carry our burdens

 God knows how much we need companions, people to walk with us and comfort us. He provides us with those people, in the form of parents, siblings, mentors, and friends. They are people put there to walk through life with us, to help us up when we fall. Through them, God comforts us, gives us guidance, and draws us nearer to Him.

 Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: if either of them falls down, one can help the other up.” 

 There are people in your life who God has put there to help you. Don’t ignore them Roses. They are there to help you and comfort you. The walls we’ve built may make it harder to open up to them, but in the end it is so, so worth it. 

 If you’re struggling to open up, make sure you find someone you trust to talk to – a close friend, your youth leader, or perhaps a family member. Talk to God about opening up to them, and ask for His guidance. Finally, remember that whoever you’re opening up to loves you and cares about you. 

 God is always there

 Sometimes, people aren’t there for us. We may open up, only to find ourselves still feeling alone and hurting. Even in those moments, however, we are not alone. God is always there. He is our loving Father, and He is guiding us and watching over us. 

 Isaiah 43:2 “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned;” 

 God is your comfort and your strength. So turn to Him, Roses. When it’s hard, when you’d rather sit and cry, turn to God. It will be hard at first. Tearing down walls always is. There is some part of us that would rather sit in our sorrows, instead of turning to God. 

 So fight that part of yourself, Roses! I’ve experienced the desire to simply ignore God in the middle of struggles. But I can attest to just how wonderful it is to turn to Him, break down the walls, and let Him in. 

 Don’t block God out of your life. Let Him in, and experience the comfort that our Heavenly Father gives. 

 Fight the walls that your pain tries to build

 Remember that the people in your life love you. God loves you. He will comfort you in your pain, and provide you with friends to help bear your burdens.

Don’t cut yourself off from those who want to help you. Don’t let your pain create barriers that force you to struggle on your own. You don’t have to carry this burden on your own, Rose.

Julia Naus

Ever since she was little, Julia has loved to create things with words. As she’s grown in life, she’s seen and experienced how God’s love can restore and give hope. She writes with the goal of shining God’s light for others and pointing them toward a greater hope. As a contributing writer for the Wilting Rose Project, she hopes to encourage other young women, reminding them of the one who gives us our worth.

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